May 15, 2011

Complaining is a waste of time


I’ve forgotten what it feels like to have a man in my space. I’ve forgotten what it feels like to be embraced. Regular shit like hugs, kisses, sitting next to a man. What the fuck…..ugh I feel so alone sometimes and I swear no one understands. While I know that this is not true, others feel like I do also. I just feel so hopelessly alone sometimes. I don’t know how to connect to people. I don’t know how to let people know that I care. I don’t know how to allow new people into my life. I feel like I push people away. I know that I have plenty of good qualities but sometimes I swear my bitchy moodiness is gonna make all my friends run away. Oh and a man? Please. That won’t even ever fucking happen because I’m not welcoming or friendly. Well, that’s a lie. I am. When I feel like it. But not randomly. I walk around looking angry and upset and who wants to talk to that? No fucking one, maybe a crazy fool. Ughhh I’m soo damn tired of writing about the same shit over and over again. Like seriously. It’s a problem that I have the power to fix and yet what am I doing? Sitting here fucking complaining.

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