April 3, 2011

Looking Back

This is a picture of me in 2005 at my little cousin's birthday party. Ignore my face, I was eating and didn't know someone was taking a picture lol. But shit I was fucking skinny. Looking at this picture and looking at me now is a bit disappointing. I know that I always say that I'm fine being my size and I don't mind it that much. But I think I've been lying to myself and everyone else. I mean, of course I love my curves, they compliment my height and frame. But I could be much smaller than this while still being curvy and sexy. I know that I constantly talk about this without taking any action but I guess it's just always on my mind. Honestly, I'm a bit scared to lose weight. Does that make any damn sense? Yeah, I didn't think so. Well, for one, I have to actually commit myself to it, completely commit. And I have issues with staying focused to reach a goal. This is something that I really want. I have to keep reminding myself that with hard work and discipline I can be a much better version of myself. Maybe I need to sit and think about why it is I want this. Hmm, Pt. 2 coming soon....

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