For the past couple of weeks I've been thinking about getting a weave, I even glanced at wigs briefly. But it seems that the more I consider it, the more it sounds weird to me. I really love my hair, I just want a little break, which makes sense. But the thought of a weave makes me feel like I'll be dishonest. No. It would just a be a style. And it could be kinda fun. The first time I had a weave I liked it because it was different. But both times I had a weave after a couple of weeks I was bored and missed my hair.
While I do realize that a weave would just be a style, I personally have always had issues with doing things to my appearance that aren't in agreement with who I am. I seldom ever wear makeup and when I do its mostly just eyeshadow and mascara. I remember going to the mall with a friend in high school and we got a free makeup session. All the lady did was put some eyeshadow on me and I barely wanted to walk out of the mall. I felt so weird, I didn't feel like people would be seeing me when they looked at me because of a little bit of green powder on my face. The first time I got a fake ponytail I didn't want to walk outside because it wasn't my hair. I know that this sounds like I'm too extreme and probably a bit crazy, but that is how I felt at the time. I know that I can do plenty of things with my hair. How I choose to wear it isn't my identity. It's just that wearing things that aren't a representation of who I am makes me feel naked and exposed to the world.
The first time I got a weave was when I had relaxed hair and I felt the same way then. It was around prom time, I wanted to wear my hair curly but I had cut my hair recently and it wasn't long enough to pull off the look. So I bought some curly hair and sewed it in lol. I felt so awkward walking around with extra hair on my head but after a while I fell in love with it. It was cute, different and simple. It was literally a shake and go style. But my issue is that now that I'm natural, I loooove wearing my own hair out much more than I ever did with relaxed hair. However, there's nothing wrong with me giving my hair a break and switching up my look for a bit.
Bottom line, my hair doesn't define who I am.
Sooooo to weave or not to weave?