March 26, 2012

Single Woes

Random ass rant about my (lack of) love life:
  • I don't know how to flirt. I come off bitchy and defensive and I think that guys think I want to cut them by the way that I look.
  • I've never really dated. I met my first boyfriend when I was 15. We were together until I was 17 and I've been single ever since. I've talked to a few guys since but the last time I was talking to someone was almost two years ago. I feel so out of the loop when it comes to dudes. And it doesn't help that I come off a bit harsh. I really don't mean it though :/
  • I haven't dated in a long time and I'm a bit scared because I don't think I have "dating etiquette." Whatever the fuck that's supposed to be...
  • When I do date someone they are going to have to understand that I do not put on shows. I don't pretend and I don't take bullshit. So if I'm "supposed" to say certain shit and act a certain way, that shit ain't gonna happen. I'm awkward, I'm blunt, I laugh a lot, I have a lot of quirks. And I like me. I don't plan on changing the way I talk and act just to make someone else comfortable. Maybe I'm stubborn. Maybe I just don't care. But why should I act all sweet and phony just so you can be upset and confused when my true colors show??? Nah, that would be a waste of time and energy.
  • I don't like talking about being single because then I overthink everything and start thinking there must be something wrong with me that no one wants me. But that's not the issue. It's not like I'm some crazy unlovable chick. I  may have my crazy moments but that's not why I'm single. I'm single because I don't ever meet people, ever. Plus I don't know how to appear approachable so I probably scare off all dudes lol. 
  • Soon I'll be back in Brooklyn where my choices will (hopefully) multiply like crazy. I refuse to stay in my house all the damn time like I've been doing these past few years. Things just can't stay this way.   

No comments: