March 9, 2011

Conforming

I just read my homie Mocha's blog about conforming, which she definitely wrote about me lol. I'm not upset, I know that I do weird things that others don't understand. So I'll explain my stance on conforming.

For as long as I can remember, I've questioned why we do what we do and why society thinks certain things are acceptable. Its interesting that I ended up doing Sociology and Black Studies because they fit right into who I was before I even got to New Paltz. But anyway, back to my rebuttal. I didn't ever like saying the pledge in school because those words don't represent me. I don't like repeating oaths or pledges because I just may not believe in what is written. So why should I say it? When I refuse to clap, stand up, or even sing happy birthday(which I haaaate doing lol) it may seem like I'm being disrespectful. But why should I even do it? Because everyone else is? Because it would be common courtesy? Common courtesy according to who? I should just follow what everyone else is doing because I should? No, not good enough. Its not that I'm trying to be a nonconformist. I just don't like giving energy to things I don't deem significant.

Of course I have to conform in some way anyway. Right now I'm wearing jeans from Old Navy which were mass produced overseas to be sold to countless people all over. I'm pretty sure someone else has these jeans and I didn't have much of a chance to be 'difficult' when I bought them. I had to go to school and be around other people that spoke a bunch of nonsense all the damn time. I didn't like people then and I don't now. I'm different, I know it. And instead of me conforming to being like others I always kept to my damn self. Idk why, just always been that way. Ask my family, I'm the weird defiant one who doesn't agree with anything or anyone. When we go to church I don't like standing when the preacher says to, I don't like clapping when the preacher says to. If I'm not already inclined to clap, I should just because you said so? Sounds like I'm a rude bitch but people only have the power you give them and I like to keep mine. Call me crazy if you wanna. If I don't feel like doing something, most likely I wont. Call me lazy if you wanna. I don't care. I gotta be in agreement with what I choose to do. If it doesn't come to me when I'm being asked, I just wont do it. Sometimes I clap or stand or sing along. But only when I feel it. It's pretty simple to me. But, ehh, whatever.

No comments: