February 2, 2012

Tired of Being Miserable

Sometimes I forget that I have the power to control my moods.

Last night I was in a disgustingly horrible mood. I just couldn't stop thinking about how fucked up life is. Then I caught myself. Why the hell should I be sitting around moping around dwelling on how shitty things are when I have the power to change them? Even if I didn't have the power to change my situation, I would still have the power to change my outlook on life. When I got up this morning it seemed like every damn thing pissed me off. What the hell? After I left my 9:25 class something changed. I'm not too sure exactly what happened but I just felt good as hell. And it made me realize something. I should feel this way every damn day. And you know why? Because I have that power. I just can't forget it anymore. I can walk around smiling and happy just because I feel like it. And I will.

Side note: I hate, absolutely HATE it when I'm in a great mood and my friends are like "Ooh Shatera, what's wrong? What's up? Why you smiling? What you happy for?"

I hate this for two reasons:
1. What does it say about me that being in a good mood is out of the norm for me? Yeah, kinda sad.
2. Why the fuck are you complaining about me feeling good? Just leave it alone. Let me smile and don't burst my bubble.

Anyway....I am going to try my best to keep a positive attitude. I'm just too damn tired of being miserable.

Part II coming soon...

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