January 7, 2011

Love songs make me sick. pt 2

I'm not saying that I need a man in my life to make me happy. That's not true at all. I just miss having a man around. I don't have any male friends, I don't hang with any of my male cousins and I haven't had an interest in God knows how long. I don't want my desire to be around a man to be confused with insecurities and a need for validation. That's not the case. I know who I am and I love me. I just wish I had that in common with someone else. I don't need a man around to make me feel better but shit I need some damn testosterone in my life.

What's also not helping this feeling is that since I've been home for break I have been missing my father like crazy. I guess since I'm home, I'm constantly reminded that he isn't here. Memories pop up on a daily basis and I love them but at the same time they make me a bit sad. I miss having a man around, I miss having that man around. You cant find a daddy's love anywhere else. I know I just went on a tangent but I honestly don't give a fuck.

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