November 12, 2009

Unknown

No one knows me....
And although I complain about this, I think I like it this way. Twisted right? I wanna be acknowledged while simultaneously I'm terrified of having the spotlight. WTF?

I stay in my own little box, only saying hi and bye to people, never really getting close. And when I do get close, it never seems to last. But I want people to see me for who I really am, not the hi/bye me. But if I never stop how could they? I don't allow it yet I long for it...always have. I've never really had many friends and while I can just blame people for not seeing the real me the real blame should be put on me. Using my shyness as an excuse can't work anymore. I'm tired of being shy and quiet. TIRED of it, on some real shit.

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